Character Dossier: Mr. L. ProsserCopy Anchor Link

"Mr L. Prosser was, as they say, only human. In other words he was a carbon-based bipedal life form descended from an ape. More specifically he was forty, fat and shabby, and worked for the local council.

Curiously enough, though he didn't know it, he was also a direct male-line descendant of Genghis Khan, though intervening generations and racial mixing had so juggled his genes that he had no discernible Mongoloid characteristics, and the only vestiges left in Mr L. Prosser of his mighty ancestry were a pronounced stoutness about the tum and a predilection for little fur hats.

He was by no means a great warrior: in fact he was a nervous worried man."

— The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Chapter 1

Mr. L. Prosser was an unremarkable municipal civil servant employed by the local council on Earth (Sol III). In galactic history, he occupies a poignant, darkly comic footnote: he was the unwitting terrestrial counterpart to Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz, striving to push a local municipal bypass through Arthur Dent's home at the exact moment the Vogon Constructor Fleet was dropping out of hyperspace to push a hyperspatial bypass through Earth.

Ancestral Lineage & The Visions of KhanCopy Anchor Link

Despite working a quiet desk job and rolling his little fur hat round the top of his head whenever flustered, Mr. Prosser carried within his genome the pure, direct male lineage of Genghis Khan:

• Physical Vestiges: Centuries of gene shuffling had erased all warrior traits, leaving only a pronounced stoutness about the tum and an irresistible predilection for little fur hats.
• The Spear & Fire Visions: Whenever pushed to severe agitation, Prosser's mind was overcome by vivid, terrifyingly attractive visions of Arthur Dent's house being consumed with fire, and Arthur himself running screaming from the blazing ruin with at least three hefty spears protruding from his back.
• The Shouting Horsemen: Moments of intense bureaucratic frustration filled his skull with noise, horses, smoke, the stench of blood, and a thousand hairy horsemen all shouting at him. In a high dimension of which humanity knows nothing, the mighty Khan bellowed with rage, while Prosser merely trembled slightly and whimpered in the mud.

The Yellow Bulldozer StandoffCopy Anchor Link

On the morning of the world's destruction, Prosser was dispatched to superintend what he anticipated would be a routine demolition:

1. The Legal Mandate: Ensure Arthur Dent's squattish brick house was cleared out of the way before the day was out to make way for the municipal bypass.
2. The Obstinate Homeowner: Arriving at the property, Prosser found Arthur Dent lying flat in the cold mud directly ahead of an advancing yellow bulldozer.
3. The Union Dilemma: Prosser was not driving the machine himself; rather, the bulldozer drivers sat around drinking coffee and experimenting with union regulations to see how they could turn the situation to their financial advantage, while their union spokesman argued with Prosser over whether Arthur Dent constituted an actionable mental-health hazard.
4. The Mud Exchange: When Ford Prefect arrived and casually pointed out that someone simply needed to be lying in front of the bulldozers to stop them from advancing, Prosser—confused, exhausted, and desperately hoping for a diplomatic resolution—agreed to lie down in the mud in Arthur's stead so the two friends could slip down to the village pub for half an hour.

Cosmic OblivionCopy Anchor Link

Mr. Prosser remained lying face-down in the West Country mud, with the mud folding around his bottom and oozing into his shoes, as the union representative approached for further negotiations. Minutes later, the Vogon constructor ships filled the atmosphere, bringing a permanent close to local bypass disputes.