Character Dossier: Grunthos the FlatulentCopy Anchor Link

"The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a recitation by their Poet Master Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem 'Ode To A Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My Armpit One Midsummer Morning' four of his audience died of internal haemorrhaging, and the President of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived by gnawing one of his own legs off. Grunthos is reported to have been 'disappointed' by the poem's reception, and was about to embark on a reading of his twelve-book epic entitled My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles when his own major intestine, in a desperate attempt to save life and civilization, leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain."

— The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Chapter 7

Grunthos the Flatulent was the celebrated Poet Master of the Azgoths of Kria and the undisputed master of the second worst poetry in the Universe—surpassed in sheer awfulness only by Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, and followed closely in third place by Vogon poetry.

The Infamous Recital & Literary WorksCopy Anchor Link

1. Ode To A Small Lump of Green Putty I Found In My Armpit One Midsummer Morning: During a live recitation of this poem by Grunthos, four members of his audience died of internal haemorrhaging, while the President of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived only by gnawing one of his own legs off.
2. My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles (Twelve-Book Epic): Reported to have been "disappointed" by the reception of his Green Putty ode, Grunthos was about to embark on a full reading of his twelve-book epic My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles.
3. Gastrointestinal Heroism: Moments before Grunthos could utter the opening lines of My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles, his own major intestine, acting in a desperate attempt to save life and civilization, leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain.