Antarean Parakeet Gland on a Stick
A revolting but astronomically expensive cocktail delicacy consisting of an Antarean parakeet gland skewered on a small stick, purchased exclusively by very rich idiots to impress other very rich idiots.
Item Specification: Antarean Parakeet Gland on a Stick
"an Antarean parakeet gland stuck on a small stick is a revolting but much-sought-after cocktail delicacy and very large sums of money are often paid for them by very rich idiots who want to impress other very rich idiots"
— The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Chapter 17
The Antarean Parakeet Gland on a Stick is widely regarded by culinary critics, galactic sociologists, and the Megadodo editorial board as the single most egregious manifestation of conspicuous consumption in known galactic history.
Sensory & Gastronomic Profile
- Physical Presentation: A small, fibrous, glistening organ roughly the size of a prune, impaled upon a thin skewer of polished white Antarean bone-wood.
- Flavour Matrix: Universally described by honest gourmands as resembling cold engine grease mixed with pickled rubber bands and burnt battery acid.
- The Social Currency: Because obtaining one involves bribing corrupt customs patrols in the Antares system and outrunning high-speed interceptors, the skewer serves as indisputable evidence that the host possesses more money than taste, sense, or sanity.
Smuggling Lore in The Hitchhiker's Guide
The Guide contains an entire sub-chapter devoted to the economics and logistics of parakeet smuggling. When Ford Prefect's copy crashed against the bridge console of the Heart of Gold during an evasive dive over Magrathea, the machine immediately began declaiming covert packing techniques and price-fixing strategies for Antarean export rings.
Heavy-Duty Wet Weather Gear
A bright yellow, oilskin-coated waterproof hooded over-suit designed to deflect horizontal rain, acid drizzle, and torrential methane squalls across hostile planetary biomes.
Arcturan Mega-gin
A dense, volatile distilled liquor frozen into crystalline cubes. Step Three of the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster recipe. Must be kept strictly iced or the aromatic benzine is lost.