Guide Entry: VogsphereCopy Anchor Link

"He was the way he was because billions of years ago when the Vogons had first crawled out of the sluggish primeval seas of Vogsphere, and had lain panting and heaving on the planet's virgin shores . . . when the first rays of the bright young Vogsol sun had shone across them that morning, it was as if the forces of evolution had simply given up on them there and then, had turned aside in disgust and written them off as an ugly and unfortunate mistake. They never evolved again: they should never have survived."

— The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Chapter 5

Vogsphere is the ancestral planet of the Vogons, orbiting the star Vogsol. Billions of years ago, when the first primitive Vogons crawled out of the planet's sluggish primeval seas and lay panting and heaving on its virgin shores under the first morning rays of the bright young Vogsol sun, the forces of evolution gave up on them there and then, turning aside in disgust and writing them off as an ugly and unfortunate mistake.

Evolutionary Overcompensation & Vogon DepredationsCopy Anchor Link

While the Vogons survived solely through thick-willed, slug-brained stubbornness ("Evolution? they said to themselves, Who needs it?") and eventually used surgery to rectify their grosser anatomical inconveniences, the natural forces on Vogsphere worked overtime to make up for their earlier blunder by bringing forth three marvels of nature:

1. Scintillating Jewelled Scuttling Crabs: Glittering crustaceans which the Vogons ate after smashing their shells with iron mallets.
2. Tall Aspiring Trees: Trees of breathtaking slenderness and colour, which the Vogons promptly cut down and used as firewood to burn the crab meat with.
3. Elegant Gazelle-Like Creatures: Graceful animals with silken coats and dewy eyes, which the Vogons caught and sat on. They were no use whatsoever as transport because their backs snapped instantly, "...but the Vogons sat on them anyway."

The Migration to the Megabrantis ClusterCopy Anchor Link

Vogsphere whiled away the unhappy millennia until the Vogons suddenly discovered the principles of interstellar travel:

• Total Abandonment: Within a few short Vog years, every last Vogon migrated from Vogsphere to the Megabrantis Cluster, the political hub of the Galaxy, where they now form the immensely powerful backbone of the Galactic Civil Service.
• Annual Crab Exports: Despite attempting to acquire learning, style, and social grace in the Megabrantis Cluster, the Vogons still import twenty-seven thousand scintillating jewelled scuttling crabs from Vogsphere every year to while away a happy drunken night smashing them to bits with iron mallets.